What are you wearing?

I like how you can tell things about a person by what they wear. I love how you can tell so much more about that person by what they always wear.

Over the last 6 months I've accumulated several things that I always wear... they give me stories to tell, they remind me of what's important in life, and they remind me of who I am/who I want to be.

My Aggie ring. Engraved on the inside is "Katherine Elizabeth Farr" and it has '12 as my class year. (But yes, I'm graduating in 2011... long story). There are many Aggie traditions and so much Aggie history tied to the ring. And I love meeting fellow Aggies all around the world just because we noticed each other's rings. Ask me about the lovely older couple I met in the Narita airport in Japan in 2006 or the Mercy Ships chaplain that I met this summer. :)

 My RoadID. This is the most recent addition, thanks to encouragement from my brother Brian. It has several emergency numbers and some basic medical information... and on the bottom line it read "No reserves... no regrets," a shorter rendition (to make it fit on one line!) of Jim Elliot's "no reserves, no retreats, no regrets." OK, maybe I'm paranoid about something happening to me, but I'd like to know that if I get run over or collapse at a football game or something that a bystander would find my RoadID on my ankle and would be able to contact my family! And hey, it could become a fashion statement; look at Chacos--and now Vibram Five Fingers! :)

My promise ring. This came from my dad on my 16th birthday and I've worn it every single day ever since then. It shows quite a bit of wear and the band is all scratched up, but I love the garnet stone that reminds me of Proverbs 31:10 "...her price is far above rubies." And did I mention that it's made by my favorite jewelry company ever, James Avery? I love how it looks almost medieval and it made both Dad and me happy--he wanted gold and I hardly ever wear gold jewelry; white gold is the perfect solution! :)

 My heart's not my own... and part of it's in Africa. My dad gave me the heart charm and I picked up the Africa charm at a little artisan market in Lome, Togo. So many people have commented on this necklace and have asked me, "Is there a reason that Africa is special to you?" And I reply that I plan on spending the rest of my life there. It's more than a place I want to go on a missions trip, it's more than a reminder that I need to increase awareness about social justice... it's part of my heart.

So that's what I'm wearing... this pretty much describes me, who I am, who I want to be, and what I want the world to know about me. What are you wearing?

Relationships Part 3 - Emotional Purity

Over the last two weeks I've been reading "Emotional Purity: An Affair of the Heart" by Heather Paulsen. I opened the book with a bit of trepidation, but as it was highly recommended, I decided to give it a shot... and I soon found myself underlining passages here and there. I'd recommend it as a wonderful quick read (it's only 153 pages long) that will give you a lot to think about and cause you to view guy/girl interactions in a new light.

She starts out with a fictional couple's story--how it started out so well and began quite harmlessly between two Christian friends, yet ended in real pain to both parties--and ties all of the book chapters back to that story. When I read the story again after reading the book I saw red flags all throughout the relationship--many of them red flags I hadn't seen the first time.

Here are some of my favorite phrases and quotes that just got me thinking...

"Keep in mind that God created marriage to be an example of the relationship between Christ, the Bridegroom, and the church, His bride. God wants the relationship between a husband and wife to mirror the relationship between Christ and the church: Since marriage begins at the commitment level, we need to line up friendship, dating, courtship, engagement, and marriage with God's depiction. Why should our path toward earthly marriage look or act differently? Our path should be commitment then intimacy." (page 58)


"Many of you would say that friendship is important in marriage, and I would wholeheartedly agree, but are you an intimate friend with Christ before you make a commitment? No! You grow into a deeply intimate friendship with Christ after you make a commitment. Why do we allow ourselves to think that God would be pleased with dating, friendship, courtships, or marriages here on earth that look different than His design for our walk with Him?" (page 61-62)


"Only after we enter into a lifelong commitment with God may we come into the Most Holy Place of intimacy with Him. Step one: a lifelong commitment. Step two: intimacy. It is impossible to love Him before step one, and He does not let us get to know Him personally before the commitment." (page 63)

"Commitment equals protection." (page 64)


"The need for a marriage partner is gone when emotions are freely bestowed on anyone who comes along. I hope my future husband will be starving for female attention. If other girlfriends have filled in my place, my husband won't be longing for me. But if he waits until God introduces us, he will be lonely for female attention and companionship and will appreciate me a great deal more." (page 65)

"Do you fear being single the rest of your life? Or do you fear being in a marriage not ordained by God?" (page 73)

"Next to salvation, your choice of a mate is the biggest decision of your life. God is not going to leave you hanging." (page 80)

"[Tracy] opened up to Mike (two characters is the fictional account she opens the book with) beyond her comfort level in hopes of being more attractive to him, thereby putting her timing above God's timing." (page 86)

She also quoted from a TV show where Dr. Laura Schlessinger was a special guest on the topic of marital affairs and couples who had emotional relationships with others besides their partners. Dr. Laura summarized her feelings on the matter this way:
"Intimacy is not just about physical encounters. When someone shares feelings, secrets, desires, flirts or flatters, or even places himself or herself in a compromising situation, you are being intimate. The final analysis: all forms of intimacy should be reserved for the marital relationship or else you are taking something away. Something that belongs to the spouse and giving it away to someone else. That wasn't what the vows were about.
The ultimate deterrent to all of this is a strong set of moral values, rules, and standards. These keep you from even taking the first step. Because, for sure if you don't take that first step, then you won't be there to take that final fatal step." (page 137)

Wait

Wait - by Russell Kelfer


Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate . . .
And the Master so gently said, "Wait."

"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.


"My future and all to which I relate
Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no' to which I can resign.


"You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."


Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate,
As my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting for what?"


He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine . . .
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.


"I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.


"You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence are all you can see.


"You'd never experience the fullness of love
When the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.


"The glow of my comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.


"You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
But, oh, the loss, if you missed what I'm doing in you.

"So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still . . . Wait."